documentary

DAI:

SOTD: a movie script ending by death cab for cutie
WIKI: make a silent movie

this is all i need for mine.

three f's

DAI:

SOFD: when she's near by fiction family
WIKI: cake in a mug

today was pretty uneventful, except for a couple incidents at work.

first, one little boy decided to bite another little girl. oops. lets just say his parents were not very happy when they picked him up.

second, i left the building and got about a half-mile away before i realized i had left the back door unlocked, so i turned around and went back. When i got there, all the fences were locked so i had to climb over and then went and locked the back door. epic. and i even made it back in time for dinner.

yesterday was my day off, so i drove to cafe ladro in downtown kirkland where i had the best foam ever on my vanilla latte. i did my devotions while sitting in behind the front window watching cars go by and pedestrians walk with their dogs. i had a conversation with a woman about the weather and the meter maids which is pretty personal for never meeting before. haha. after that, i continued to target where i bought amelie and the new fray cd (which is AMAZING btw). then after i got home, listened to the cd, and ate some cheesecake, i bought fiction family which is totally amazing too! jon foreman and sean watkins join together to produce some beautiful melodies and meaningful lyrics. i would expect nothing less. another band i would recommend is a fine frenzy. sweet female vocals with airy and light verses. very relaxing.

oh and sometime, you should read searching for god knows what by donald miller. it has impacted my life in a big way. good stuff.

peace

-a girl

a grand list

this seems to be the thing to do, so...
25 things you may or may not know about me, and may or may not care to know.
i guess you're supposed to repost and tag 25 people??

1. when i was 5 or 6, i almost got dragged out in a riptide. thankfully my mom saved my life.

2. im going to school to be a teacher, but my dream job would be something in the arts: artist, working at an art studio, being a dance teacher, or something like that.

3. last wednesday i spend 15.5 hours in a tree.

4. i don't have a bike and i really need to get one.

5. one of my best life experiences was state track meet 04.

6. even with all my involvement in sports, i've never broken a bone or had a significant injury.

7. im going to run a marathon someday.

8. almost all the flowers i have ever gotten are dried and are hanging from my ceiling in my bedroom.

9. i keep all the fortune cookie fortunes i get.

10. chicken pot pies are amazing.

11. i live in seattle, but i love portland way times more.

12. after church searching, in seattle, i've started going to quest church, and in portland, eric and i have started going to imago dei.

13. if it weren't so cold, i would never wear socks.

14. i despise umbrellas. just wear a parka. or a hood. or a hat.

15. peanut butter and celery is one of my favorite snacks. mmm delish!

16. i have decoupaged close to 30 notebooks.

17. my favorite colors are purple and green.

18. i would really like to go on a hot air balloon.

19. it doesn't matter if im late or not, i still manipulate traffic to get places faster. i.e. i keep track of which roads have more lights, how long i have to make the light when the cross walk sign starts blinking, etc.

20. im one of the few people i know who actually wears a watch

21. i have a good sense of direction and can give good directions and quickly use a map.

22. in highschool, i got an almost perfect score on a spacial reasoning test.

23. now that i work in extended care, i despise playdough.

24. i love wearing skirts and scarves.

25. someday i hope to teach overseas.

free association

DAI (daily art image):

SOTD (song of the day): Ooh Ah by The Kooks
WIKI (wikihow): be creative

so i was reading a wikihow article on how to be creative and they recommended doing exercises each day to help get your creative juices flowing. the one i chose to do is called free association where i start with one word and then write down the first word that comes to mind in association with the word before.

start here: car
mazda
sequim
squish
costco
hot dogs
closed
drive
music
matt costa
road trip
california
mom
golden gate
fog
seattle
coffee
palio
hawthorne
theatre
slumdog millionaire
movie
failure
race
heat
thermochomatic
skirt
purple
gorilla
jane
disneyland
frantic
terrible
traffic
405
slow
sloth
animal
drums
nathan
extreme
running
england
elizabeth bennet
hero
will smith
ridiculous
homework
time
disappears
cloak
snuggie
hilarious
demetri
sneezes
earrings
port angeles
carly
laugh
entourage
rap
3OH!3
locket
american girl
past
pillow case
tie dye
summer
portland
bronx
accent
mizto ball
new
calendar
art
passion

in the beginning

these are some polaroids that were taken within the last year.
yeah.
there ya go.

on to bigger and better things...

so i have am sitting at my desk at school which i normally don't do. my desk is pretty messy and is probably the reason i don't use it that often.

list of things on my desk:
lamp
picture of lauren and i
my camera
eric's camera (oops)
a shirt im making for carly
my linguistics book
c.s lewis's the weight of glory
an american apparel shirt for eric-yeah it's a thermochromatic!!
color ink for my printer
an empty izze bottle
ariel chapstick
my cell phone
rings
receipts
coffee mug
ipod
current newspapers
burn after reading
more textbooks
mug with soup in it
sukie iron-on book
memory chip for a camera
scissors
camera case
schedule
purler bead flower (which is half on annie's desk)
a half of a chopstick
a bottle of orange paint
aaron's newsletter from china
a vitamin waterbottle
a picture of eric and i
a post-it note

anyway. amazing that i even have room for my computer...

i think that is all. mostly because i just remembered that burn after reading is due back today and i have to leave and get it there before midnight. fun stuff.

p.s. the fray's new album comes out in 11 days!

evolution of music

it seems like every fall i have some theme song that i tend to live by or some albums that have greatly influenced my life at the time.

although it's been a while back, i can still remember about the last four years and it kinda signifies how i've grown as an individual. the lyrics in most of these songs mirror the way i felt when i went through different stuff. anyway, here it goes...

FALL 2005:

albums:
keane-hopes and fears
death cab for cutie-plans
the fray-how to save a life

songs:
someday you will be loved-death cab
we might as well be strangers-keane
everybody's changing-keane
look after you-the fray
how to save a life-the fray

FALL 2006

albums:
john mayer-room for square
jack johnson-in between dreams
augustana-stars and boulevards
matt costa-songs we sing
joshua radin-we were here

songs:
love song for no one-john mayer
yellow taxi-matt costa
boston-augustana
winter-joshua radin
fall away-the fray

FALL 2007

albums:
mae-the everglow
across the universe soundtrack
timmy curren-word of mouth
indoor picnic music vol. 1&2

songs:
steer-missy higgins
hard times-eastmountiansouth
something-jim sturgess
after your heart-phil wickham
back in your head-tegan & sara
1234-feist
monday-ALO
green eyes-coldplay

FALL 2008

albums:
coldplay-viva la vida
the gabe dixon band-self titled
the maccabees-colour it in
natalie portman's shaved head-glistening pleasure

songs:
death and all his friends-coldplay
toothpaste kisses-the maccabees
sophisticated side ponytail-n.p.s.h.
lovely tonight-joshua radin
the night starts here-stars
5 years time-noah and the whale
violet hill-coldplay
free ride-nick drake
you remind me-andy shauf
can't go back-the weepies

there you have it. hopefully i'll keep it updated so you can all share in my love for good music.
peace.

this is our day today

today i left for work almost an hour early so i could have some time to drive and clear my head and listen to some music. as i shuffled through my ipod, i realized it was a matt costa day. i began with cold december which hit the spot immediately. halfway through the cd i came across a song called these arms...the first verse was fine, but then he sang the chorus which goes like this...

this is our day today
can you find the way back to these arms
this is our day today
won't you find the way back to these arms

and my heart sank.

there are a pair of physical arms that i want to find a way back to all the time...
and that's really hard to deal with...

but more importantly, there are spiritual arms that seemed to call this out to me...
"ellen, won't you find your way back to my arms?"
i felt like Jesus himself were sitting right there asking me this.
i felt like He was sad.
and i felt sad too.
cause it's been about time that i get real with Him again.

and reader, i'm going to be honest.
and this is hard cause so often i would rather just have people think i'm doing great.
why? that's an entirely other conversation...
but yes, here it is, it's out on the table for all to see:

school is not what i thought it would be.
i'm starting to check out.
i'm struggling with my devos.
i haven't been very social.
i haven't gotten involved.
and i'm homesick on top of it all.

everyday i honestly wish that the day would go by faster just so the next day will go by faster so i can get home sooner.

and i know this isn't what it's suppose to be like.
and i know that it's my own fault for not applying myself.

i just had to be straight with my abba today.
these next 3 years are probably gonna some of the most difficult years of my life.
here's why:
1. i have to get through school (and im not very fond of school)
2. i have to make a foreign place my home.
3. i have to wait to be with eric.

i told God i was sad. i told him i was not sure i could do this. i told him i didn't like this.

and then what popped into my head?

joy. joy? JOY?!?!?! in the midst of trails?
of course...gross.

i decided i need an attitude adjustment.

so this blog gets more personal. more honest.

this was my prayer:

dear Lord,
this is what i'm asking. you know me better than anyone ever. you know my weaknesses & strengths, so Lord, prune me. cut out my weaknesses. i know its not gonna be easy, but following you isn't always easy. refine me. whatever you want me to go through to get me more like you want me, please do it.
i surrender.
i want to find a way back to your arms.
and i'm sorry for holding out on you this last week or so...
love, ellen

so it seems like this note is pretty depressing.
but it's not suppose to be.
i feel like i triumphed today.
i got something right.
He spoke. i responded.
now i need to act.

this life doesn't get easier does it?... :)

and we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. and hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
-Romans 5:2b-5

let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. and let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
-Hebrews 10:22-26

therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great could of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race that is set for us. let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for teh joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
-Hebrews 12:1-2