your pretty little...

 

hairbows

 

hats

 shoes

 

 surfboards

dresses


finding pretty things on the internet while i sit at the airport. yup. 

far from home, but so happy

i'll be honest.

it's been hard to find the words to write lately.

there has been so many complications with my job and i've just been trying to sift through my feelings and find reality. and frankly, this is not the place where i do that. but i have finally come to some healthy conclusions about where i'm at and how to proceed. hilariously though, this doesn't mean i've come to any drastic decisions. it's more of accepting the confusion i've felt and promising myself to keep my head up.

blah. i'm making this sound so dramatic. but i suppose that's how i've felt. 

anyway, moving on...

i'll get to the good stuff and tell you what i've figured out. 

1. despite not knowing what or where my job is going to take me in the future, for now, i'm gonna stick it out and make the best of it. this is turning out to definitely be the adventure i signed up for. :)

i mean, i get to see stuff like this while at work! mt st helens!

2. although being away from eric 5 days a week is not what i thought this job would look like, our appreciation for each other has grown exponentially. it's true, distance does make the heart grow fonder.

<3

3. having parents and friends that speak the truth into my life is such a blessing in my life.

in a conversation with carly a few days ago, she challenged me to think about what is it god wants me to do and what he doesn't want to do everyday. in general, get done what i can, focus on loving those around me, and trusting him. things to not do: worry, stress out about the unknown...

pretty much exactly what i was doing...and it was just causing frustration and not being able to find joy around me. and then my mom a day or two later basically said the same things. 

4. randomly, today i read that hugging for 6 seconds is the minimum time necessary to promote the flow of oxytocin and serotonin, mood-boosting chemicals that promote bonding.  
yup, work those (awkwardly) long hugs:)

this month i'm working on study and cleanliness.

it's kinda hard to work on keeping the house clean when i'm only home 2 days a week, but eric's been awesome and making sure our room is clean when i get home which such a huge blessing for me.

i've been thinking about this quote from the chapter on study in the Celebration of Discipline:

"Study produces joy. Like any novice, we will find it hard work in the beginning, but the greater our proficiency, the greater our joy. Alexander Pope says, 'There is no study that is not capable of delighting us after a little application to it.' Study is well worth our most serious effort."

to be sentimental, the hardest part about this job is being away from my family and friends in portland. i already mentioned the heart growing fonder with eric, but it's true for everyone else too. i miss seeing my family more regularly, and i miss thursday nights being with my home community. and i miss just hanging out with eric and our awesome roommates kat and luke. 

my heart definitely lives in portland.

i even just miss the city. :)

holy world's longest blog post, batman.

to finish up, just wanted to say that a few albums have dropped lately, which have made my life so happy! check out the following bands!

esperanza spalding, originally from portland, and a jazz bassist as well.

 

 this band. gonna be part of some sweet summer sounds.

 

also alabama shakes, jason mraz, and eric hutchinson released albums that have dropped within the last week or so and they are phenomenal. 

so go enjoy some good music:)

and apparently john has started wanting to look like johnny depp. ehhh don't think he can pull it off, but i'm stoked for his new album next month!

kk. i'm out. love you all.

kind of like a pillow fight

 

for march's happiness project i'm working on focusing on fasting/marriage. 

but since i haven't posted for a bit, let me get you caught up on things.

so i finished ground school to be a flight attendant. yup. pretty exciting! 

my first flight is coming up and i'm nervous, but excited too. 

currently, eric and i are trying to work out all the kinks to make this job work for us. 

mainly, me being based in another city. 

yeah.

although we knew it was a possibility, it's not been easy for us to come to grips with this.

it's kinda like how a pillow fight sounds really fun until you realize that getting hit with pillows actually kind of hurts and you have a huge mess to deal with afterwords.

but you could get really great pictures and a fun memory in the process ya?

i'm definitely getting the adventure i was hoping for. :)

but i haven't even had my first flight yet! so i bet i will fall in love and forget about all this. :)

mostly, i think it comes down to the fact that i romanticize everything i can. 

and then when it doesn't work out like i plan, i get discouraged.

but i have some really great support from my husband, dad, family, and friends

encouraging me to let things play out and be hopeful about how it's gonna be. 

which is probably the best advice ever.

and i have to say that i have been so thankful for the hospitality and support i've felt from the people who have offered to let me stay with them in my base city. 

god is good and people are too.

as for the happiness project, i took some time off for ground school, as i was very busy studying and learning a whole bunch of new skills and fun stuff about airplanes. 

and now it's already halfway through march and i need to get back on track. 

so i'll get to it and keep ya posted. 

role reversal

 so 2 weeks of training have been accomplished. only 2 more to go! 

i'm getting nervous to be out of the classroom and up in the air, but also very excited.

a very strange and funny phenomenon has happened to eric and i during my training. 

you see, normally, i'm the one who is less busy and has a little more time on my hand. 

so when eric gets home at night, i'm pretty excited to see him and talk and relax...

but during the last two weeks, it has been the opposite.

instead of me asking for quality time, it's him.

and it's so precious.

i've had to turn down potential date nights, movies, and games with him cause of my studying. 

and i hate turning down quality time. so finally, last tuesday, i went out with him...

...to a blazer game!

and i'm so glad that i took a night off to spend hanging out with him. 

plus, the blazers smashed the spurs, which is always a good time!

my happiness project has unfortunately fallen to the wayside a bit for the last 2 weeks.

i've been longing to sit down and read and journal and think, but with the nonstop waterfall of information i'm learning in training, i decided it was better to take a break. so i'll start that up again when i'm done with class! 

in the meantime, you can pray and hope that i will get portland as my domicile (read: home base city). and that the next few weeks will go by quickly and successfully! 

although it sounds like training has been all consuming (and i definitely feel like it is), i have been able to have some fun still like: having my friend lauren stay with me last weekend, spending time with my family, snuggling my dog, hosting justice conference friends from Tennessee, skyping my brother in australia and my cousin in hawaii, and having some good quality time with anne and carly and eric!

p.s.

also, just have to shout out that this week my friend carly got engaged this past week and i'm sooooo very excited for her! 

 <3

something good

let's make this happen, girl
you gotta show the world that something good can work
and it can work for you
and you know that it will

let's get this started girl
we're moving up, we're moving up
it's been a lot to change
but you will always get what you want

 ___________________

today was my first day of training.

honestly, i'm just tired. sleeping in one hour increments is not the way i hoped to start.

but hey, things happen 

and you just gotta make it work out.

so instead of dwelling on exhaustion and nerves,

here's my list of 'something good':

1. getting off at two tomorrow instead of having to get fitted.

2. ohyeahwait, valentine's day is tomorrow.

3. having a very supportive husband who got up early to make me a special breakfast today,

then helped me study when i got home.

(even though he has two jobs and school to do).

4. not to mention supportive and loving family and friends.

5. making it to ground school. 

6. listening to something good can work out by two door cinema club 

aka theme song of the month.

7. clean room and fresh laundry finished this weekend

8. knowing that i'll meet lots of new awesome people this month at ground school.

9. my roommates getting me orange juice, honey greek yogurt, and ice cream to celebrate my first day.

10. i made it through day one! 

zooey and me

true story 

(that happened about 15min ago)

him:

"hey look what i brought home for you!"

*hands over flowers and unveils cheese assortment and wine*

her:

*grin across face, breaks into song*

"i'm having the time of my life and i never felt this way before,

and i swear, it is true, and i owe it all to you...

you 

you 

you

you

you 

you

you

you 

dirty bit! 

wroam wroam wroam wroam

*dances all crazy like*

him:

"you remind me of the new girl"

(yup, zooey and me: pretty much the same people)

annnnd that's pretty much how we do around here. 

<3

on my knees

 

hi. 

there's a multitude stray thoughts in my brain right now:

need to study and memorize asap.

want to drastically makeover a piece of furniture.

analyzing the multitude of dreams that i've had lately.

praying that i'll get portland as my domicile.

discipline, motivation, discipline!

declutter. organize. clean.

be at peace with what today will bring.

finish mailers.

soak it in. appreciate beauty. meditate.

listen. be quiet. dance. be expressive.

 

i start training next week for my new job. 

still trying to mentally prepare for it. 

currently my brain still looks like the left picture. 

and it needs to move to the right. 

my brain doesn't want to let go of the freedom and peace.

but i'm also excited for new knowledge and challenges. 

in the midst of all these flashes of contending thoughts,

those of peace and those of anxiety,

i know that where i need to be is falling on my knees. 

my own strength isn't enough. 

acknowledging and depending on the strength of my abba 

is where i 

need 

to

be.